For Your Consideration: Square Moments From the Golden Globes

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So nice to see a bunch of Squares at the Golden Globes last night. While RoboBrangelina snuggled with each other and pretended to do normal human things like "smiling" (see above), the celebrity Squares in attendance kept the mood hilarious.



Best BFFs - Busy Phillips & Michelle Williams
[via Busy-Phillips.org]

Best BFFs Runner-Up: Jake Gyllenhaal & Jason Segal


Best Nerd Laugh - Natalie Portman


Best Crazy Face - Christian Bale, Drunk Jesus


Best Acceptance Speech By A Crazy Face - Christian Bale


Best Fashion - Helena Bonham Carter
[via Jason Merritt, Getty Images]

Most Adorably Awkward - The Reluctant-To-Go-Onstage Duo


Most Adorably Sleazy - RDJ


Best GIF Mutilation



Best Withering Stare - Michelle Pfeiffer, HBIC
[image via Jezebel]

Most Missed Guest - Brendan Fraser, for his 2010 Audience Member Performance


Classiest Square - Duh, you guys
[via InStyle]

Readerly 2011: Accomplished

Just a quick note to let the world know that I've finished by second book of 2011. And the lucky winner was O Juliet. Spoiler alert: they die at the end, obvi, but they go to heaven and are together forever! Also, Romeo got a hair cut about two-thirds of the way through, so phew!

Next up: Annabel by Kathleen Winter. I read about this in the New York Times and two hours later I was at B&N buying it. I mean, a week ago if you had asked me what my ideal protagonist would be, I would have said, "A Canadian hermaphrodite." And here like a gift from Heaven is a book about just that. And there's a creepy shirtless boy on the cover, which makes it 100% perfect for some T reading.

Even NPR Says I'm A Square

Oh, my beloved champagne-colored 2000 Buick Century. My first car. I loved that car. I loved its cassette player that was augmented by a ten-CD-changer in the trunk that was controlled by some little gadget in the front seat that fell beneath the pedals whenever I went over railroad tracks. I loved the smooth ride and the fact that you could fit 44 people in the back seat and 17 more in the trunk. Like, it was a really good car. I knew it wasn't cool, but it was free and I never had one problem with it.

Imagine my joy when Car Talk on NPR (a favorite radio show of me and 45-year-old men) talked about how Buicks were for squares. Exact words. Well, if loving a Buick is wrong, I don't want to be right.

By the way, happy snow day, everyone!

For Your Consideration: Golden Globes for Squares

Squares!! Have you heard? Tonight is The Golden Globes! Obviously this means I'm going to have to catch repeat showings of the wonderful Downton Abbey on PBS, because the Globes this year is shaping up to be a fantastic show. Plenty of Square-friendly films have come out in recent months, and I've made it my business to get acquainted with many of them.

Black Swan, for example, appeals to Squares to may obsess over dance movies, be fond of Darren Aronofsky movies, or just like staring at Natalie Portman. Blue Valentine should appeal to those Squares who are sick of romance being glamorized in horrible rom-coms, or it may appeal to Squares who just like looking at Ryan Gosling. See where I'm going here? Let me break it down for you: if Ricky Gervais doesn't deliver the funny as official host (doubtful; he always kills it at award shows), then at least the audience will be FIIIIIIIIIINE.



How YOU doin', Inception cast?!


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And in cast any of you care about the "film" part of the Golden Globes, here is a list of who I'd pick as Golden Globes winners and why, if I ruled the Foreign Press. (Let's get serious, I should.)

TV:
Best Television Series - Drama

Boardwalk Empire (HBO)
Dexter (Showtime)
The Good Wife (CBS)
Mad Men (AMC)
The Walking Dead (AMC)

Square Winner: Let's start by saying The Good Wife is surprising solid. Good story, cable-quality look, stellar acting, and full of kick-ass female characters. Boardwalk Empire, I've noticed, is an underground hit with a lot of you Squares. Mad Men was predictably good, but this season it meandered around a bit too much while characters were fitting into their new lives/new office setting. The Walking Dead is showing some great promise, and I hope the show doesn't tank next season due to the firing of their writing staff and all. So, what does that leave? Your fave and mine, Dexter.
Why so Square? Dexter keeps Squares on their toes...just when you think the show is getting stale, they'll throw a great season at you and blow your mind.

Best Performance By An Actress In A Television Series - Drama

Julianna Margulies (The Good Wife)
Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men)
Piper Perabo (Covert Affairs)
Katey Sagal (Sons of Anarchy
Kyra Sedgwick (The Closer)

Square Winner: Elisabeth Moss is divine, and certainly worthy. I wouldn't get up and threaten to shut off the tv if she wins or anything. But how great would it be to see Katey Sagal get recognized for her Queen of Badassery character? She convinced me she was a completely different entity from her Married with Children character after only one episode in Season 1...long before she threatened to kill a baby this season.
Why so Square? Squares like innovation, and I don't recall another biker Lady Macbeth character on television EVER, do you?


BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES – DRAMA
Best Performance By An Actor In A Television Series - Drama

Steve Buscemi (Boardwalk Empire)
Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad)
Michael C. Hall (Dexter)
Jon Hamm (Mad Men)
Hugh Laurie (House)

Square Winner: Yes, yes. I know, The World. Bryan Cranston is great! Jon Hamm is so sexy! Hugh Laurie is really British and not an invalid! Steve Buscemi...is...Steve Buscemi, finally in a leading role on a major network "hit!" Yaaaaaaaay. Oh, did I say Yay? I meant snooze. The media has beaten these actors' roles into the ground already. Whoever wins is fine. So. Let's just say the Square winner is Steve Buscemi?
Why so Square? Because he plays a character called "Nucky" and was great in Desperado back in the day?


Best Television Series - Comedy or Musical

30 Rock (NBC)
The Big Bang Theory (CBS)
The Big C (Showtime)
Glee (FOX)
Modern Family (ABC)
Nurse Jackie (Showtime)

Square Winner: NO PARKS & RECREATION OR COMMUNITY?! YA DONE GOOFED, FOREIGN PRESS!!! We Squares are revolting and naming both Parks & Rec and Community as winners.
Why so Square? Oh, I dunno...excellent writing? Characters you actually care about? Ron Effing Swanson?!!

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Best Performance By An Actress In A Television Series - Comedy or Musical

Toni Collette (United States of Tara)
Edie Falco (Nurse Jackie)
Tina Fey (30 Rock)
Laura Linney (The Big C)
Leah Michele (Glee)

Square Winner: Oh. I didn't realize it was considered "good performing" to constantly twist your face in agony for every single song you sing, be it a happy song or a sad song. How silly of me. Still...I think I can safely say that Tina Fey is the real winner here.
Why so Square? Liz Lemon is a poster child for Squaredom -- a loveable, hilarious Other who stays true to herself. And if that involves staying at home alone with a Snuggie and eating cheese? So be it!


BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES – COMEDY OR MUSICAL

Alec Baldwin (30 Rock)
Steve Carell (The Office)
Thomas Jane (Hung)
Matthew Morrison (Glee)
Jim Parson (The Big Bang Theory)

Square Winner: Alec Baldwin! I don't want to rag on the certainly award-worthy acting happening in Glee, the singing high school show, but Matthew Morrison's character is a shitshow. Bad teacher, bad husband, bad boyfriend, too clingy, too selfish, not hot in any way, mediocre dancer...am I leaving something out? If he were supposed to be playing Mediocre Teacher or The Villain, I would certainly support his nomination. But he's supposed to be The Popular Teacher and The Hero, so fuck that mess. Yes, Internet, I saw his abs. Big deal.
Why so Square? Dryness, with a heaping scoop of Zing! insults, attracts Square love like none other.


Best Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television

Carlos (Sundance Channel)
The Pacific (HBO)
Pillar of the Earth (Starz)
Temple Grandin (HBO)
You Don't Know Jack (HBO)

Square Winner: Temple Grandin.
Why so Square? Good on Starz for being nominated, but Temple Grandin for two big reasons. 1.) It was great to see Angela Chase doing something other than mooning around and thinking about Jordan Catalano. 2.) Temple Grandin didn't horribly slaughter the MidWestern accent. I'm looking at YOU, You Don't Know Jack!!!!

Best Performance By An Actress In A Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television

Hayley Atwell (Pillars of the Earth)
Claire Danes (Temple Grandin)
Judi Dench (Return to Cranford)
Romola Garai (Emma)
Jennifer Love Hewitt (The Client List)

Square Winner: Wow. I bet this nomination is the crowning achievement of Jennifer Love Hewitt's career, huh? I won't say another word about her, then. Enjoy your night, lady! But the winner is the old biddy from Return to Cranford. Sorry, DAME Old Biddy!
Why so Square? Everyone loves a crotchety lady who is willing to help her friend when her friend's cat eats expensive antique lace and poops it out.

Best Performance By An Actor In A Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television

Idris Elba (Luther)
Ian McShane (Pillars of the Earth)
Al Pacino (You Don't Know Jack)
Dennis Quaid (The Special Relationship)
Edgar Ramirez (Carlos)

Square Winner: Idris Elba, aka Stringer Bell, aka Mumbles, aka My Friend Erin's Crush 4 Lyyyyyyyyfe.
Why so Square? Erin would kill me if I didn't declare him the winner. Good thing he happens to be the best on the list. Suck it, Americans.


Best Performance By An Actress In A Supporting Role In A Series, Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made for Television

Hope Davis (The Special Relationship)
Jane Lynch (Glee)
Kelly MacDonald (Boardwalk Empire)
Julia Stiles (Dexter)
Sofia Vergara (Modern Family)

Square Winner: Jane Lynch is freaking amazing, and she's a fellow Square for sure. Julia Stiles will continue to get a free pass simply because she ruled in the late 1990s. Sofia Vergara is funny, but compared with Ms. Davis and Ms. MacDonald, she still has a lot to prove. Thus, it’s a tie! Congratulations, Hope Davis and Kelly MacDonald! You’ve been in the shadows for far too long, but we Squares have appreciated all your interesting characters, and we’re pumped to see you finally get some recognition!
Why so Square? They disappear so easily into their roles, it’s hard to remember they’re acting fiercely. Well played, ladies.


Best Performance By An Actor In A Supporting Role In A Series, Mini-Series Or Motion Picture Made For Television

Scott Cann (Hawaii Five-O)
Chris Colfer (Glee)
Chris Noth (The Good Wife)
Eric Stonestreet (Modern Family)
David Strathairn (Temple Grandin)

Square Winner: You know who’s great? Scott Cann. You know who gives me an unsettling feeling? Chris Noth. Know who makes me cry on a cheesy show about singing teens? Chris Colfer. David Strathairn is always…in everything? (Love you, Strathairn, but you do need a big showboating role sometime soon to keep things interesting. Just a suggestion; you’re certainly a good actor.) So, that leaves Mr. Eric Stonestreet as our winner!!
Why so Square? Like Caan, Stonestreet makes me want to hang with his character. Like Colfer, Stonestreet can tug at my heartstrings. Unlike Noth, Stonestreet can create a believeable complex character.



MOVIES:

1. Best Motion Picture – Drama

Black Swan
The Fighter
Inception
The King's Speech

Square Winner: It’s another tie!!!!! Congratulations, Black Swan and Inception; you all managed to find huge audiences despite non-“blockbuster” subject matter. The gorgeous art direction and the focus on intriguing characters doesn’t hurt, either.
Why so Square? Tight scripts, excellent acting, and bitchin’ soundtracks.


Best Performance By An Actress In A Motion Picture – Drama

Halle Berry (Frankie and Alice)
Nicole Kidman (Rabbit Hole)
Jennifer Lawrence (Winter's Bone)
Natalie Portman (Black Swan)
Michelle Williams (Blue Valentine)

Square Winner: Natalie Portman, simply because I haven’t had the chance to see Winter’s Bone yet. When I do, I reserve the right to change my decision, because that film looks gooooood. So, congrats for now, Natalie Portman! Your descent into madness could’ve been the stuff of Melrose Place episodes, but your restraint during the first half of the movie made the last act a-freakin-mazaing.
Why so Square? Have you seen The Professional? Ok, then you know Natalie Portman’s been appealing to Squares for some time now.


Best Performance By An Actor In A Motion Picture – Drama

Jesse Eisenberg (The Social Network)
Colin Firth (The King's Speech)
James Franco (127 Hours)
Ryan Gosling (Blue Valentine)
Mark Wahlberg (The Fighter)

Square Winner: It’s finally your time, Firth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Great performances by all, but Firth’s work was a cut above. (No pun intended, Franco.)
Why so Square? Peep it:
And never forget:

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Best Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical

Alice in Wonderland
Burlesque
The Kids Are All Right
Red
The Tourist

Square Winner: Bwahahahahahahahahaha! Nope. There are no winners in this category. (Note: I think The Kids Are All Right would've swept this category with Squares if -SPOILER- Julianne Moore's affair with Ruffalo had been explained properly. Is Moore's character bisexual or what? Please don't leave us thinking she just decided to switch teams, 'cause we all know that's horseshit.)

Best Performance By An Actress In A Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical

Annette Bening (The Kids Are All Right)
Anne Hathaway (Love and Other Drugs)
Angelina Jolie (The Tourist)
Julianne Moore (The Kids Are All Right)
Emma Stone (Easy A )

Square Winner: Are you kidding?! Clearly, Emma Stone! The others are wonderful actresses, but they’re walking through these roles. That’s right, I’m calling them out. You phoned in your performances, ladies, so don’t think no one noticed!
Why so Square? Overused saying, but seriously…Emma Stone is a breath of fresh air here. Time will tell if she can deviate from her sarcastic Easy A schtick, but for now it’s endearing.

Best Performance By An Actor In A Motion Picture – Comedy Or Musical

Johnny Depp (Alice in Wonderland)
Johnny Depp (The Tourist)
Paul Giamatti (Barney's Version)
Jake Gyllenhaal (Love And Other Drugs)
Kevin Spacey (Casino Jack)

Square Winner: Jake Gyllenhaal.
Why so Square? Because Squares are still mad he didn't get a Golden Globe award for Brokeback Mountain!

Oh! And also? Jake Gyllenhaal never gave his extremely ill-informed opinions about rapists on camera. Ahem. (Public service announcement: there is no "type" of rapist. Rapists can come in all shapes and sizes. The "He couldn't be a rapist, he doesn't LOOK like a rapist" mentality is hurtful to victims and truly unacceptable to perpetuate in public...especially by an actor who has stated many times he has no business talking politics, etc. We Squares expected better from you, Mr. Depp. I am very ashamed you used to be my favorite actor in the world.)

Best Animated Feature Film

Despicable Me
How To Train Your Dragon
The Illusionist
Tangled
Toy Story 3

Square Winner: Toy Story 3. Damn those toys for being so loveable!
Why so Square? Well, it’s a kids movie that makes adult Squares cry a little. Randy Newman and Tim Allen are involved. But mostly…Michael Keaton plays Ken, y’all!! All hail The Keaton!


Best Foreign Language Film

Biutiful (Mexico/Spain)
The Concert (France)
The Edge (Russia)
I Am Love (Io Sono L'amore) (Italy)
In A Better World (Denmark)

Square Winner: Biutiful, directed by the wonderful Alejandro Gonzalez
Why so Square? Squares don't sky away from dark, raw subject matter. Bring it, Gonzalez!!

Best Performance By An Actress In A Supporting Role In A Motion Picture

Amy Adams (The Fighter)
Helena Bonham Carter (The King's Speech)
Mila Kunis (Black Swan)
Melissa Leo (The Fighter)
Jacki Weaver (Animal Kingdom)

Square Winner: Melissa Leo captures Mickey Ward's brazen, controlling mother perfectly, creating a great “Oh, I know her” character. You know she’s a killer actress when you realize her character’s guilt tripping you, the audience, into siding with her!
Why so Square? There are “sexier” choices in this category, but Squares have to give it up for the HBIC.

Best Performance By An Actor In A Supporting Role In A Motion Picture

Christian Bale (The Fighter)
Michael Douglas (Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps)
Andrew Garfield (The Social Network)
Jeremy Renner (The Town)
Geoffrey Rush (The King's Speech )

Square Winner: Dear Christian Bale, Not only do you give the performance of the YEAR in The Fighter, but it’s also very nice to see you smiling and enjoying yourself at award shows this season. Keep it up, mister!
Why so Square?

Best Director – Motion Picture

Darren Aronofsky (Black Swan)
David Fincher (The Social Network)
Tom Hooper (The King's Speech)
Christopher Nolan (Inception)
David O Russell (The Fighter)

Square Winner: Christopher Nolan, you old so-and-so. Well done, good sir! Pleae don’t stop challenging audiences by creating huge movies for the thinking (wo)man!
Why so Square? The Cult of Nolan has been building since Memento for good reason – his movies find the perfect balance between “sweeping epic” and “tight character drama.”



Best Screenplay – Motion Picture

Danny Boyle, Simon Beaufoy (127 Hours)
Lisa Cholodenko, Stuart Blumberg (The Kids Are All Right)
Christopher Nolan (Inception)
David Seidler (The King's Speech)
Aaron Sorkin (The Social Network)

Square Winner: Could any of the other nominees have written Inception as well as Nolan? No? Then I think we know who the winner is, don’t we? (Sorry, Sorkin. I still love The West Wing, if that makes you feel any better.)
Why so Square? Nolan wrote a script about a team of mind thieves, people. That’s some Terry Gilliamesque Squareness right there!


Best Original Score – Motion Picture

Alexandre Desplat (The King's Speech)
Danny Elfman (Alice In Wonderland)
Ar Rahman (127 Hours)
Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross (The Social Network)
Hans Zimmer (Inception)

Square Winner: Inception…BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRM.
Why so Square?

Best Original Song - Motion Picture

“BOUND TO YOU” — BURLESQUE Music by: Samuel Dixon; Lyrics by: Christina Aguilera, Sia Furler
“COMING HOME” — COUNTRY STRONG Music & Lyrics by: Bob DiPiero, Tom Douglas, Hillary Lindsey, Troy Verges
“I SEE THE LIGHT” — TANGLED Music by: Alan Menken; Lyrics by: Glenn Slater
“THERE’S A PLACE FOR US” — CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER Music & Lyrics by: Carrie Underwood, David Hodges, Hillary Lindsey
“YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE LAST OF ME” — BURLESQUE Music & Lyrics by: Diane Warren

Square Winner: None of these fools. Inception again! Don’t you know you can also successfully sing the theme from Inception?
Why so Square?

Congratulations, Square Winners! Even if you lose to inferior performers on Sunday night, you're still beloved by us Squares.

Have fun watching the events unfold Sunday night, everyone!

P.S. Just FYI, the GGs will be shown on that one network that was mean to Coco. You know, the Network-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named? Yep, that's the one. So, if you're already not interested in watching the Globes, then you have another reason for not watching it! You're welcome; we try to be friendly to Squares of all sorts here at SITNP.

Readerly 2011: A Bump (or two) in the Road

I am the worst at finishing books. How many times have I started Moby Dick or The Jungle? Even though those were greats books and I loved them while I was reading them, something up often pops up and takes away my attention for a couple of days and then some other book shimmies its way into my eyeline and then suddenly I've forgotten what Ishmael was doing and I have homework to catch up on and I'll get back to it when I have time, which is 2017. (Come to think of it, maybe this is why I have such a hard time finishing my own writing. I have limited experience with the endings of books. Man!) Anyway, I was hoping this Readerly 2011 would help in that front, but so far it has not.

The Kite Runner is sad, you guys. I just can't handle all the sadness in the winter, and while I've got a couple weeks to kill until class starts, I don't want to be all bummed out during my days of sweet freedom. Sigh. So that's being put aside.

Here's what I've picked up. Kate: Kate Middleton: Princess in Waiting. Um, why am I so obsessed with William & Kate's wedding? I'm even thinking of taking April 29th off work so I can watch it live! What is my deal? I'm not British or even remotely British. I'm kind of Irish, but the Irish & British have notoriously bad blood, so that can't be it. And I was never one of those girls who wanted to play princesses. I would have much preferred playing Presidential Daughter on the Titanic. Nonetheless, I picked up this paperback bio of the possible future queen of England, and am devouring it. Right now, it's just a basic chronology of the different branches of Kate's family from Victoria's time until now, so I love it. So much coal mining, I tell ya! And they keep on bringing up Durham. You know how I love Durham!
So because reading two books is not enough for me, I've also picked up third. I'm going through a really big Romeo & Juliet phase at the moment. Honestly, I've been going through this phase for the past two years, and I'm just now admitting to it. It's very much like the princess thing. In high school, I thought R&J was pure crap, and now I still think that the characters are pretty silly, but for some reason I love the story! Seriously, if someone could just explain to me what it is in my psyche that makes me love R&J, I could figure out my whole life. Although, probably it's because of this:
Oooh, I love you 1968 Romeo! Best Romeo ever! He's so whiny and stupid and rolling around on the floor crying! "Come on, boy! Get yourself together! Stop those tears from rolling down your beautiful face!" That's literally what I yell at the screen during most of the movie. It's just oh so good. If you haven't seen it since sophomore year of high school when your entire all-girls class was mooning over Leo D, I highly suggest you check out the 1968 version again. It can be a little hard to get a hold of, maybe they're rereleasing it, I don't know, but watch it on Netflix or something. Come on.

Anyway, in my R&J obsession, I bought O Juliet, by Robin Maxwell. I stumbled upon it by accident while working at B&N and then couldn't get it out of my head, just like Romeo with Juliet, and then I impulsively married it--I meant bought it. So far there's been one mention of Juliet's bosom actually, literally "heaving", but many many mentions of Juliet's bosom existing, as well as a lot of quoting of Dante. Whatever. It's amazing, so cheesy and enjoyable. And I don't usually say this, seeing as how I am a prude, but I just cannot wait until these two crazy kids do it. It's going to be so good.

Class starts two weeks from today, so wish me luck getting all the reading possible in. I have a lot to tackle.

Readerly 2011: Book One Done

I finished up Brat Farrar on the T yesterday morning, and I have mixed feelings about it. I saw the solution coming from miles away, and so the entire time I was reading I was assuming there would be some sort of twist. Well, I supposed at the end there sort of was, and everything turned out lovely and everyone was happy, but it wasn't enough of a twist for me. However, I really enjoyed reading the book itself. As always the writing was great, and I didn't want to skip any part of it, not even the gobs of pages about horses. Oh man, there was so much about horses. Honestly. So I suppose that in the end I recommend the book, but not enthusiastically. I'd go for The Franchise Affair instead.

Next up and already started is The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. I know, I know! I'm way behind the times. Anyway, I just started this yesterday, and I'm a decent bit in already, I'd say, but this book is decidedly longer and not such a light read, so it might be a bit until I get it done. Nonethless, book #2 of 2011 is begun!

Anti-Square Quote of the Week

"I’m not sure that young women are as interested in reading about superheroes. The fundamental dynamic of the superhero story has historically been more appealing to boys than to girls. There are any number of very successful superhero comics over the years that have had a better gender balance than others, but the genre as a whole has been a more male genre."

- Paul Levitz, President of DC Comics [via The Comics Journal]

Oh really?!


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Paul Levitz, really?! I constantly defend DC Comics against the "sudsy" Marvel, and now you go and say this? Have ya done a lot of research with various female comic readers nowadays, Mr. Levitz? And yet, you're going to make this huge judgment call? Really?!

There has already been a great poll about this topic, so I decided to check in with my female friends about it, too. 100% of my friends with vaginas are interested in reading about superheroes. The only female friend of mine who doesn't actually read comic books frequently...is in the process of co-authoring an epic saga about superheroes.

And then, Paul Levitz, you go on to say this?

"I don’t think the love for the character necessarily means that they love the comic expression of them. Or maybe they do and with the right writer at the right moment, that can happen and have a larger audience. Certainly any version of that has been tried by the company at some point or another in time. You’ve got the whole period around 1972 when Dorothy Woolfolk comes back into the company and she’s editing both the romance comics and the girl superheroes. She’s given Wonder Woman, Lois Lane, and Supergirl on the theory that we can sell more of those to girls with a woman driving the bus. It’s not clear that it particularly worked, and the company abandoned the experiment fairly quickly."

REALLY?! You're really going to cite something from the 1970s as being relevant to today's marketplace? And you're going to slight Dorothy Woolfolk in the process? Dorothy Wolfolk, who INTRODUCED KRYPTONITE into the Superman comics?! Wow. And you're going to act confused as to why women in the 1970s didn't want to read about Wonder Woman?! As this bad-ass writer points out, perhaps the lack in sales had more to do with the fact Wonder Woman was power-less and violently tortured on covers. Really.

Paul Levitz, please think carefully before you speak next time. Better than that -- try to put some serious, thoughtful time into how to please the current female comic readers out there instead of making sweeping generalities and alienating potential future buyers.

Keep this kind of talk up, and I'll give all my business to Dark Horse. Really.


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A Readerly 2011 is Promised

Last year a few of us were talking about how many books we'd read in 2010, and I found I couldn't come up with a very solid number. Certainly over ten, right? Do books I didn't finish count? What about my one hundreth reading of Kavalier & Klay? In an attempt to feel more confident about my bookishness as we stare down the end of the world in 2012, I'm going to document every new book I start in 2011. Cross your fingers I stick with it.

Despite the facts that I have too many books here in Boston (so many that there is a pile of 15 or so that I have to move from my desk chair onto my bed in the morning and the reverse at night) and that I bought 2 books over vacation, I went out yesterday and bought another book! Geez. Dang you, used bookstore I love. Anyway, since it was a used book it was only $3, and I had four billz on me, and so it was obvious.

So now I am proud to present the first book of 2011:

Brat Farrar by Josephine Tey

I didn't say they had to be scholarly books or prize-winning literature, okay? Anyway, this summer my sister got me hooked on Josephine Tey. The Franchise Affair was fabulous and Miss Pym Disposes kept me guessing until the end. Well, almost the end until they revealed it all. Anyway, she's great, and the book is short and a mass market size, which is perfect for me lugging around on the T. It's also an old edition, the 1971 Berkley Medallion edition, and it doesn't have a barcode on it, which is something I generally look for in books. Seriously. I once spent a very sad summer reading a really sad Joyce Carol Oates because I found a copy without a barcode. Old books also smell cool.

According to the blurb on the barcodeless back, this Brat Farrar kid looks like the supposedly dead heir to a fortune, and so is persuaded to pose as the guy and claim the inheritance. I'm a little under a quarter of the way through, and Brat's about to be introduced to the family, and one of them isn't buying it. Why not? Perhaps because he murdered the dead heir? WHO KNOWS! Well, I will in a couple of days.

Also, they keep talking about how fair and beautiful this guy is, and since it's old-timey (the 40s), I'm picturing this one:


Hells yeah, Jude Law in Wilde! Stop being so prissy, Jude Law! But seriously, has the dude ever been better looking than is this film? (Yes, in Alfie.)

I'll keep you updated on my reading progress.