"There are, however, the people who need a cell phone audience. We have all seen them. They are on the cell phone in the middle of the grocery store or department store, putting on a show. Every expression measured, exaggerated, so to portray just the right amount of concern and annoyance. Their voices carry like an opera tenor, and they laugh as if they haven't seen the sun in years. They are the people that you look at and think 'crazy as a hookless pirate and gabbier than a two-headed parrot.'"
-- M.R., a fellow Square, discussing an annoying woman who always talks on her cell phone in the gym despite signs to the contrary
M had no picture of the actual woman, so I'm using this SNL still of a skit where a fashionisto makes a big show out of pulling out the tiniest cell ever.
P.S. VC encourages you to start using "crazy as a hookless pirate" in everyday conversation, because it's super awesome.
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